When the Irrelevant Becomes Relevant
I was leading a group of franchise owners and head office staff from Anytime Fitness, on a 500km bike ride in Thailand, and what surprised me was how quickly we got there. I don’t mean the end of the ride or the end of each day, and I don’t refer to the speed in which we covered the distance, it was where the conversations went and how quickly we shared. I shouldn’t have been surprised because it happens every time.
Like so many of these rides that I have been leading in Thailand since our first corporate ride back in 2012 (who I will be back riding with in four weeks’ time), I meet the majority of the riders for the first time in the foyer of the hotel in Bangkok as we prepared to set off on the journey.
The idea of the ride for the Anytime Fitness crew came on the back of a keynote presentation I had given, talking about the strength of relationships that are formed during times of adversity and why doing hard things is good for us. Our rides are achievable for most; given a period of training, yet they are not without struggle and sacrifice. It is within the struggle and sacrifice that you find true reward.
The sacrifice might be in the time you commit to the training in the lead up. You can choose to ride and train, or choose to do something else. With the busy lives that many lead, there has to be a choice and there has to be a sacrifice. Do we want to choose pain or comfort? Progress comes with pain, but that is a choice, and it's easier to choose comfort, every day of the week.
When I trained for the 1400km run, I wasn’t a runner, and I have to be honest, I didn’t love the training or the lonely grind out there on the road, but never did I regret getting it done, and I always loved it later.
Having led 47 of these rides in Thailand, with a distance varying from 500kms to 1600kms, I have witnessed the effort, the struggle, the challenge and people getting to the edge of where they perceive their limits to be. For the majority, they push the pedals and find progress, through one revolution of the wheel at a time, but progress is present. They exceed their perceived limitations and find joy, jubilation and celebration in the discovery they make amongst the doubt and struggle.
The only greater gift I have of witnessing this time after time is the shared celebration that occurs within the group. How quickly and strongly the bonds are built in those times of struggle and sacrifice. It’s within the times of adversity, the self-doubt, the voice saying “I can’t do this," that others step up to be by your side.
Creating memorable shared experiences that involve challenge and struggle accelerate and deepen the relationships we have going into the experience. They evoke feelings of unity, togetherness and understanding that “unless you were there, you wouldn’t understand”. The building of those relationships often starts with irrelevant conversations whilst on the bike, or standing around at the water stop. There’s no form or structure, no pressure to engage, yet we are one and we are sharing. Not just conversations but an experience. We quickly learn the irrelevant conversations become relevant to building and connecting in our relationships. When combined with struggle and sacrifice, there is the added layer of mutual respect that is built.
So what is it that you’re doing that might not bring comfort today, but leads you to where you want to be tomorrow?
When I stand on stage and share these stories, what I often see in my mind are the faces of those who didn’t think they could, but did anyway. The sweaty faces. The tired faces. The faces of people who have just done something harder than they thought possible. They are the ones who fill me with the emotion that audiences feel when I speak. I owe thanks to those who have given me the privilege of witnessing their victory.
The best experiences are not always the easiest. They are the ones that ask something of us, bring people together and leave us changed by what we shared.
If you are looking for a keynote, leadership session or shared experience that helps your team build connection, resilience and perspective, I would be happy to have a conversation.
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