Filling the Resilience Tank
The tank of resilience is running pretty low right now for many who have been directly impacted by the latest round of lockdowns sweeping across Australia. You don’t have to be locked down to be impacted and for those who are, the common message is this time around is much harder than last year.
In 2020, it was new and we embraced the challenge as best we could, we all learnt to pivot, believing that we were “all in this together”. Twelve months on and we’re not where we thought we would be and certainly not where we want to be. And “all in this together”…not so much it appears.
What I hear when I speak with people is it’s the uncertainty that presents the biggest challenge to their mindset, not knowing when or what the outcome will be. For many we are not in control, we can’t take action and doing nothing feels helpless and useless, the path out of this has been set by others and for some they will passionately disagree with the direction set.
The lack of knowing, the lack of control and fearing the worst took me back to my time working at Tha Chat Chai in Thailand. There I met a mother who had lost her family in the tsunami. She lived without knowing, with diminishing hope, but with the ever present belief that her children would be found alive. It was totally out of her control, she could do nothing but wait and wait upon others to undertake a process she didn’t know or understand. She had no timetable to work towards, had no certainly of the outcome and could do very little to influence the position she was in.
She received the call that she dreaded.
Her son had been confirmed dead, his body had been identified and she was to travel to Tha Chat Chai to meet with me and I would provide her with the body of her son. She came from a modest family and arrived in a beat up utility to collect the body of her son. We had been caught by that situation once before where we had to hand the body of a child back to their family in a body bag and resolved that would never occur again. We purchased coffins and was able to return her son with the dignity that he deserved, because no parent should receive the body of their child in a body bag.
But her wait was not over. The uncertainly, the lack of clear answers was not over.
Twice more she would be notified of the identification of her two remaining children. On each occasion I would hand back one of her children she displayed the grace, dignity and appreciation for the work that we had done leaving me feeling incredibly bad that we couldn’t do more for her.
I don’t share that story as a way of minimising the impact of the current situation we face with Covid. To the contrary, my belief is that your loss is your loss and seldom is there genuine value in comparing that to others. I share the story in the belief that even given the worst of times we do heal and better times lay ahead.
"What lies behind us, and what lies before us are but tiny matters compared to what lies within us."
Ralph Waldo Emerson.
Whilst a lot is out of our control, we do have the ability to take steps to manage our self care, top up that resilience tank and feed our soul. It might be as simple as picking up the guitar that’s sat under the bed for years, deciding you are a landscape artist or learning to ride that horse you’ve promised yourself you will do.
At Hands Across the Water, we can’t provide the answers, the solutions or a pathway out of this crisis, believe me we feel the burden and challenge deeply, however, we can offer something to look forward to and an opportunity to fill the resilience tank whilst feeding your soul. In November we ride the trails from the Alps to the Ocean in New Zealand and in January we walk the 12 Apostles in Victoria.
If you’d like to stick something in your diary, something to look forward to, knowing it will be food for your soul consider joining us. Earlier this year we rode the Central West Cycleway in Western NSW and I think all of us that rode realised how much we had missed the shared experiences. Both of these experiences brought to you by Hands will be uniquely special due to their location, but the opportunity to ride or walk in a group is where the magic happens.
Be kind to one another during these times and importantly be kind to yourself.
Regards
Pete